Last night I watched the movie Julie & Julia. Great movie. Probably not good timing.
Yesterday in staff meeting we discussed chapter 9 of Francis Chan's book, Crazy Love. We spent a good hour hashing over what we want to do with our lives that will be of lasting value. Talked about what kind of a legacy we want to leave. Asked each other what fears are keeping us from pursuing those crazy God dreams.
Then I went to watch a movie about 2 ordinary women who through hard work, dedication, and a truck load of guts and craziness changed their lives in extraordinary ways.
Made for a very reflective evening. Made for prayers filled with lots of questions. For example:
1. What do You want me to do?
2. How do I learn to be content in all things and yet be consumed with crazy dreams?
3. What am I so afraid of?
4. Who am I, and why do You need me?
5. How can I do something that will be of lasting value to Your kingdom?
There wern't as many answers as there were questions. I've found that's just the way things are with God. But there were a few answers. Softly whispered and warmly wrapped around my soul.
I am His. He doesn't need me, but He desperaly wants me. Fear is good, it keeps me dependant on Him. And He simply wants me to... believe.
Believe Him. Take Him at His word. Obey His voice.
Once step. One moment. One breath. One choice.
Today I choose to do great things for God. I will not fund an orphanage, or interpret the Bible into a foreign language. I will not publish my first book, or speak to crowds in an ampitheatre. But I will do great things! I will love God. I will love those who are around me. I will listen for a still small voice. And I will choose to belive that whatever that voice tells me, I can and will do.