Memories

It's strange how many of my life experiences are forever forgotten by my not so sharp memory. But there are certain memories that seem to never fade. They are as vivid today as they were the day they happened.

This morning I arrived to work about 5:30 as usual. The sun was just starting to come up. As I left my car and started heading to the door to the office I was aware of the fact that they birds were all up and busy. That's when I heard it. One small distant bird called out "Pretty Girl! Pretty Girl".

All of a sudden I was 7 years old again. Wearing a pink floral print swim suit, sitting at the patio table under an umbrella next to my Noni's pool eating lunch (a cheesy hotdog sandwich). When Noni said to me "Do you hear that, Keri? The birds are singing to you. Listen... they're saying 'pretty girl, pretty girl'."

And sure enough, I strained to listen and heard the clear voice of the Cardinal way up in the magnolia tree singing "pretty girl, pretty girl".

I know to most people the birds just chirp and tweet. But to this (no longer little) girl, they will always sing to me the song my grandmother taught me. Reminding me that in my Noni's eyes, and in God's eyes, I am indeed a "pretty girl".

Do more?

For the last 15 days I've been purposefully living without TV. It's been wonderfully refreshing. With the exception of The Next Food Network Star, I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything.

I've felt the call to re-focus. To re-center on God and His Word.

For the past.... oh, 5 years or so, I've been praying and asking God to help me figure out what I need to cut out of my life. I've felt too busy to keep up with my "to do" list. I often make a list of my responsibilities and prayerfully consider what I can remove from that list. Usually the list stays the same and I continue to plug away at all my "duties" just hanging in there, hoping for a day to come along where I can get a break.

But, I'm beginning to think that my line of reasoning may be wrong. Maybe I'm not supposed to subtract things from my list, but instead add things to my list.

Allow me to explain.

I'm reading these incredible biographies about men and women who lived incredible lives doing incredible things for the Kingdom of God. Consistently I'm am seeing the same habits in each of their lives:

1. They spend ALOT of time in God's Word and in prayer. It is a necessity, not an afterthought to them. It is the highest priority in their lives.

2. They were always asking God what more they could do for Him.

I very rarely ask God what more I can do for Him because, quite frankly, I'm usually too tired to keep up with my current responsibilities. But I'm starting to think my focus has been wrong. Instead of praying "God what do you want me to quit doing?" Maybe I should be praying "God quicken my mortal body to do all that you have created me to do with energy and joy" (Rom. 8:11)

I think it just might work. In fact, I'm sure it will. Because I've been praying it for the last week, and I've felt more energized and excited about my daily routine than I ever have. I've also spent more time in God's Word in the last week then I have in the last month... OK, fine 3 months.

I think these "old timers" had it figured out. Lots of time in the Word, lots of time on Kingdom work. The first fuels the second.


Heb. 12:1-3 Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

No TV Day 4

So, I can't sleep... It's because I can't watch TV. Really, it is. Every night I turn on the TV to something I'm not really interested in and it helps me fall asleep.
I think somewhere in my past I was able to fall asleep without the TV... I'm sure I was. But right now, I can't.
So... I'm a walking zombie. But, I will not cave. I will not turn on the TV. Eventually I will be able to sleep again. Right?

A Lifetime...

• An 18 year old girl sends a text message while driving and instead of attending her graduation is life-flighted to the hospital where she spent 7 days in intensive care before losing her life.
• A wife, mom, and grandmother succumbs to her long term fight with a terminal illness.
  
• A father and husband driving home on his motorcycle after a long day is struck by a truck and will never see his wife and kids again.
  
• A former classmate from high school goes to bed one night completely fine, and never wakes up.
  
• A plane takes off on a routine flight from Rio to France, and disappears somewhere over the ocean. 228 families will never see their loved ones again.

With the exception of the victims of the plane crash I was acquainted with each of the above people who recently lost their lives. All of these stories happened within the last week.

Strange isn’t it? We live our lives every day never thinking about death. Yet in the last 5 days of my life I’ve been confronted with the reality of death over and over again.

“Lord remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered—how fleeting my life is. You have made my life no longer than the width of my hand. My entire lifetime is just a moment to you; at best, each of us is but a breath.” Psalm 39:4&5

Life is so short. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow. I find myself questioning my motives; how am I spending my time, what am I investing in, am I using this life God gave me to fulfill His purposes or my own?

I don’t think that when I stand before Him He will be impressed by the fact that I never missed an episode of Lost or Extreme Makeover Home Edition. I don’t think He will ask me how much time I spent on Facebook, or how many You Tube videos I watched. I do think He will be interested in the people I loved, the times I gave sacrificially, the hope that I shared.

Today I am reminded of my mortality. But, it’s a reminder that is filled with hope. What a great honor that the King of Kings has entrusted me to carry His message of Good News, for however brief my time on this earth is. And then… to be with Him for all of eternity! Now that is reason to celebrate!!

Accountability...

I'm feeling led to turn off the TV for the month of June. Crazy, I know.

Life has been hectic... which is normal with a husband, 4 kids, a full time job, and full time ministry. But, the last few months it's been more hectic than usual. I'm spent, drained, empty, rung out, used up, withered, wasted, ...... OK, you get the idea.

I've been praying for God to give me strength and energy, but it's been lacking. Not because God's not answering my prayer, but because I'm not obeying Him.

So, in an act of obedience, and in complete faith, I am turning off the TV for the month of June. And, I am convinced that I will be refreshed and renewed through this experiment. Not sure how yet, but none the less, I'm convinced it will happen.

I tried to talk myself out of posting this blog. Because if I post this, it becomes real. It's no longer a thought in my mind, but it is now a commitment on paper (well, cyber-paper, but still...). But I need this to be real. I need the accountability.

I'll keep you posted....